Be Bothered

July 27, 2017

The first blog I ever posted was about being bisexual (or more accurately, pan sexual) and since then, I haven’t really addressed the subject of sexuality. Not because I don’t want to, more because it hasn’t been something I’ve been particularly compelled to speak about. Well, I’m compelled now.

Good old cunt flaps in America has decided you can’t be a transgender person and serve in the armed forces because of “medical costs and disruption”. This is despite the US military spending a reported $42m a year on erectile dysfunction medication (viagra) – several times more than the total estimated cost of transgender medical support, according to the Washington Post. Last time I checked, having a hard on didn’t win a war, so I’m not sure how certain costs can be justified and others not. It’s been difficult to find a definitive answer to the number of trans people currently serving in the US forces. I’ve read numbers between 1320 – 6630 right up to 15,000. Presumably if trans people are costly and disruptive, someone would be able to quantify the current numbers? #justsayin

Recently, I was asked by one of my friends why there isn’t straight pride. He didn’t ask in a nasty way, he’s not homophobic, it was a genuine question, I guess because he’d never thought about it before. I asked him what he thought Pride was, “It’s like carnival isn’t it?” Kinda. It started as a protest against oppression and that’s what it still is but it’s also a celebration of the progress that’s been made in Queer rights. You see, 50 years ago, sex between men was illegal in the UK. (Interestingly, sex between women has never been illegal. Presumably because it’s not real sex if it doesn’t involve a penis. Christ there it is again, that penis thing). 10 minutes on Google and you can find out a lot about the struggles that the Queer community has faced and still face. But I guess, why would you unless you really needed to? Unless Queerness actually affected your world? I know 14 year old me wouldn’t have given a fuck – see When did you know you were gay?

But the thing is, if you’re the President of the Free World, you kinda, sorta should know what the fuck you’re talking about. I genuinely believe that DT would introduce straight pride if he could, and white pride, and male pride because he has no idea what it’s all about. I went to London Pride a few weeks ago. It was my first ever Pride event and I went with a group of bad ass women. We had the best time, we watched the parade from Trafalgar Square, drank in the sunshine, partied in the streets and ended up in a Gay club in Soho. It was the most fun I’ve had in ages. People were having a good time, dressed how they want, being their authentic selves, not hurting anyone.

I wasn’t born homophobic but as I’ve discussed previously, there was definitely a time when I was. Maybe that was because I was scared of my own sexuality but I think it was more because that was what society taught me. I’ve been trying to understand how some sections of society still find people simply wanting to be true to themselves, so abhorrent. Queer people aren’t trying to turn anyone. There is no gay agenda. There is only a desire for equality.

So maybe you’re heterosexual and you don’t know any gay people, it’s just not a thing in your world. Well, I’m sorry but it’s 2017. It IS a thing in your world. If you’re a decent human being, you should try to understand others. For example, I don’t agree with capitalism but I understand why people do. I’m an atheist but I have a basic understanding of most religions and have respect for people with faith. I’m against right wing politics but I understand it and I know why people believe in it. I’ll admit I do try and keep these topics off the dinner party chat list but it’s not anything I would want to persecute anyone for. I don’t view Christians or Hindus or Tories or Company Directors as not deserving of human rights, why would I? It would make no sense.

We live in a time where we can access the answer to pretty much any question within 2 seconds flat. Educate yourselves. Don’t know why there isn’t straight Pride? Ask Google or Siri or Me! Not bothered about DT’s decision about trans people because you aren’t American or Trans? Bullshit. Be bothered. If you’re in America, and I know a lot of you reading this are, lobby your local politicians, support your Queer community, march, resist, be heard. Equality and human rights mean your daughter can vote and go to university. It means your son can choose if he serves in the army or not. It means you aren’t oppressed. We start letting things go because they don’t affect us and soon we will be affected, but by that point it’ll be too late.


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